Only slow cars need excuses.


Aaron says:
I moved back to Chicago last summer thinking I would drive my car and nothing happened. This summer there will be no excuses. I should say though that after nearly 6 months of sitting the Caprice fired right up - Anthony and I have it tuned pretty close so it is time to put it through its paces. After a quick fluid change, tire swap (going to try out M/T 295/55/15 radials) and A/C recharge I plan on leaving things be and putting a lot of miles on the car. Then in Fall, with Sally turbo'ed up and a free spot in Garage Mahal, it will be time to deliver a briefcase full of cash to Shaunthony's for a turbo build of my own...

Anthony says:
We're already thinking of cool ways to spend that briefcase full of cash. Meantime, Sally is pretty close to being finished, and I JUST pulled the "PUSH OFF" plate out of the mill today. Stay tuned....


Check it, skanks! For people who don't go on message forums, here is the start of me and Shaun wading through the electronic mountain of Capri build pics. Check it out:

Capri Build!

Lots more updates coming....Shaun's twin MPT70 build is under way. Stay tuned for more Zima, nut shots, Mike Pratt jokes, and cleverly altered logos / stickers.

2.10.09 (LOLLER)

Let's see, how about an update?

The Fury is still together, it still runs, it still shreds the tires at 40mph, and I can still drive it around the block / short distances.

Sally runs and drives, too (and is going under the knife machete soon). Shaun picked up a 396" Windsor to go in between the MPT-70s and JGS wastegates he's had in his basement for a while.

The Caprice has racked up tens of thousands of dollars and only a few hundred miles in the past 4 years. And it's still really slow!! HAHA, JK LOL.

Michael Pratterson's Capri is done, and thank god for that.

Shane's Cobra is well into the 9s with a Shaunthony's single MPT70 kit.

We put an eBay kit on a car once, but fuck that (even though we made killer DPs for it).

Blah blah blah blah......

11.7.07 (LOL)

Woooooo!! Update time! No Excuse and Shaunthony's vehicles are crushing Chicagoland right now as we speak!

First, the first completed Shaunthony's vehicle is not only up and running, it's kicking ass left and right....and up!! Videos, pictures, and story are featured on the new Shane page. Check it out!

Second, Aaron has the Caprice back together, and it's purring like a kitty. Check the Caprice page for more info on that as well.

Third, the FURY FUCKING FINALLY RUNS after 4 years of sitting! WITH turbos and EFI. Bzweeeeee! Go to the Fury page for the skinny. Videos to follow....


This summer has been the worst No Excuse summer in our rich and decorated history. To summarize:

Aaron wasted another cruising season (big surprise) because of paint and body work (another big surprise). I guess he didn't think my photoshopping on the old pics of his car was good enough. It hasn't gotten any faster, either. More on the Caprice page

Shaun's car has no turbos (but runs) thanks to: poorness (due to construction on the all-new Shaunthony's HQ), procrastination, no place to work, a blown headgasket last year, buying some boner-ass's idea of the ultimate Boss 302 shortblock and the resulting return (and shipping). The Incons are up for sale as well. The non-turbo scenario will change this winter, so stay tuned......more on the Sally Page

My car actually made a lot of progress! It still doesn't run, however: I can't fabricate wires, relays, anti-freeze, or a battery, so I won't be able to drive it until I have the money to buy these things. Meanwhile, I am finishing my last semester of college. The non-turbo scenario is about to change for my car as well...more on the Fury page.

Scott's car made a surprise comeback and is better than all of our cars! His last track outing (this time with a fresh dyno tune and a better ignition system) resulted in some 12-flat runs at 114 mph! More at Scott's page.


Check out these videos:

Caprice gets down and dirty - note column shifting!
Caprice 1 (9.6M)
Caprice 2 (13.4M)
Caprice 3 (12.9M)

Sally kicks some dick, then explodifies.
Mustang 1 (7.1M and shakey! sorry)
Mustang 2 (9.0M)

Bonus: some fruit-douche in a 14 second C5 wearing driving gloves, getting his ass handed to him by a Duramax!
Sad C5 (8.9M)


No updates for 5 months, I know, blow me. The No Excuse crew actually did some cool stuff this weekend, necessitating an update.

All day Friday (11.12.05), I got to babysit the Caprice and put miles on it in exchange for my time lashing the valves. That was fun - when Aaron came to pick it up, the starter gave up the ghost. (Which, I've come to learn, was blamed on me because of my motor-bump lash method, but Aaron knew the starter was dying anyway, so........shrug?) Facing a Caprice no-show at the track on Saturday, we did some minor thrash-wrenching to get a new one up and in. By 11 PM, we were in Glen Ellyn helping Shaun with a little street tuning, and by 2 AM we had all passed out while watching Fast 'n Furious. Loaded up and hit the road Saturday, got harassed by the tech guy at GLD, and got some runs in. Sally turned a couple of 11.90s @ 120 and then exploded, sort of, Aaron found himself a bit down on power, and finally, after being screwed out of countless runs because of the douchey Pro-tree idiots, we got rained out at 2pm. Pretty disappointing day, really. We limped Sally home in a downpour and called it a day, but Aaron expressed interest in hitting up Byron on Sunday.

After arriving at the track with Scott (of V6-converted Firebird fame and fortune), we found a total of 20 cars running. Aaron managed to make 25 passes (with tuning after each run) between noon and 4, which you'll know is almost unheard of if you've ever been to a dragstrip. Aaron's tweaking shaved 3 tenths off initial runs, and despite a nasty cross-wind, turned in a best of 12.352 @ 108.

More detailed accounts at the Caprice and Sally pages.


Aaron re-configured the server, which left my poor WS-FTP in the dust until I could get it to go again. I smell yet more sea-change in server land, so who knows. That's half of the reason there haven't been any updates...that and there's really nothing going on.

Shaun's car runs fine, and he still doesn't drive it. Hardcore, right? He did buy another shortblock, which should allow for some serious boost duty, but more details on that later.

Aaron got his motor back and should be tooling soon, but you know he isn't going to drive it.

My motor will never be done. Ever. Hey, at least I get to borrow my mom's minivan. Come to think of it, the thing has really shiney new paint and bodywork and stock 16" rims....maybe I can get it into Hot Rod? (See below.) But I will say this - I haven't dropped the ball on R&D. So far, my custom valvecovers are about halfway done, my custom valley plate has been engineered and planned out, my wiring harness is about done, I re-tapped my Y-block for 1/2" NPT output, my gas tank is ready to be welded for the sump, my MP water pump has been re-tapped to actually work with NPT fittings, I got an intercooler for the future air-to-water conversion, and I'm working on a Ford EDIS setup for both the Fury and Aaron's Caprice. And, who cares, because I'm still a motorless chump. Call me Deacon Blues.

Despite it all, I remain confident that the No Excuse crew will one day cruise as one in a blaze of mediocrity, with the A/C and the rollcages blaring.


Shaun bought a FAST. Kick dick!!

Aaron's motor may be done before flying cars debut!

I got a letter in the mail the other day about re-subscribing to HRM. I have to admit, I used to be a huge cheerleader for the mag....that is, until they completely regeared their magazine to cater to an audience that garners no respect from the author (see below). My reply:

Hey -

Just got your subscription renewal card in the mail; had a few Q's.

#1. I was offered some "lifetime deal" of X dollars for a lifetime of HRMs a while back. Am I not enough of a "valued customer" to recieve such a grand deal again? Did I dishonor the almighty Primedia by not RE-subscribing to a magazine with a demographic of 50-something douchebags with nothing but thick stock portfolios, C5s, hair loss, erectile dysfunction, leather baseball jackets, Starbucks mugs, lifetime subscriptions to Car and Driver, and spare time on their hands (most of which is spent watching "American-Hot-Rod-Featuring-Beard-Coddington" instead of loving their sexually frustrated trophy wives?)

#2. Who is "JKi" (the fake signature scribble) in the renewal postcard? Is it supposed to be a real HRM-staffer who signed his name digitally, which was then printed to the X million readers you lost by catering to said 50-something douchebag demographic? There wasn't a printed name below the signature on the mass-produced post card....just wondering.

Look, I would love to read about mega-dollar-billet-only street rod builds with LS1s and 19" rims, but I hear Martha Stewart is going to have her own show soon - gotta budget my time.

See you in the 10s (from the 8s), Anthony Fury

P.S. Don't send any more re-subscription cards, cockslaps.


Update time, ladies!

Looks like it's the end of an era. Shaun is getting a FAST! More on that when it happens....

The Fury's pistons are in! 24cc dish Diamond Customs, 0.990" pins, Spirolocks, and Duramoly rings. Huge thanks to Todd440 for the setup! Paraphrasing Aaron: "Too bad they have to go in your motor, I would just put them on a shelf in my living room to show how awesome I was. Forget kid's baseball trophies, Relatives would come over and realize just how badass I was." See if you don't agree. More details on them at the Fury page. Coming next: Shaun Tiede spec'd hyd. flat tappet!

Still haven't gotten to Aaron's heads, but Mitch at Engintecs has applied his fabulous blending work to the ports and would also like to cc the chambers before I dive in.

Hmmm, all 3 No Excuse vehicles yanking the front ends on street tires this summer? Intriguing.


Free time and nothing to do means it's time for an update.

< Sound of something being completed, then being dropped on the floor >

The Fury's fuel system is done. (Pics on the way.) Two Walbro GSL-392s sucking on a sumped C-body tank through -6 lines, channeling gas through one Shaunthony's custom Y-block, spitting it through a -10 line to the Shaunthony's fuel rails (and mostly through some 83# injectors), into an Aeromotive 13101 regulator (so pretty!), then returned with more -6 line. Tada! The sad part is - final bill on all of this is $2000. Sniff! $2000, and I didn't even buy a fuel cell! $2000, and I built most of the stuff myself! $2000, and I got some damn decent deals on eBay! $2000, and I don't have a brainbox! You get the picture. Actually.....

The Megasquirt is done. Yeah, I soldered the whole thing together myself. (Shower me with lavish praise and It was hella simple (and fun), all of the intermediate testing steps worked perfectly on the first try, my joints seem decent enough, and best of all, playing with the tuning software and the Stimulator is SO much fun. To the playah haytahs: I think it's actually a kickass system! Bruce and Al are gonna release Megasquirt-II, which is a solder-together-and-plug-in-processor upgrade for the current MS board. 16 bit processing, 12x12 fuel AND spark tables....FAST what? Since it hasn't been released yet, I'll be defaulting to the plain MS plus the Shaunthony's DIY-WB (which MS software will display/log) and a TFI controller. But......

I got to speak with John Meaney (if you don't know who this is, kill at PRI, and guess what - a Big Stuff 3 is going in my car, even if I'm living in a gutter by summertime. About all I can say is that it can tell you if your girlfriend is cheating on you at 50 samples/second - along with 49 other variables! Not to mention about a skibillion other features. Check their site for info if you're so inclined. I'm gettin' mine while the gettin's good - watch for the price of old FASTs and GEN 7s to drop out of the sky as people rush to sell theirs and go Big Stuff! Who do you think you are?

So what am I going to do with all of this crazy gas jewelry? C'mon, an awesome Demon 850 would have done just fine, right? Sure, bucko, if it were only that simple - maybe in another life, when a 13 second car seems fast to me (and I'm smarter). For now, let's just say my main caps won't be my best friends in a few months. Or, let's just say - do you know what a piano hinge is?

I swear to god, this fuckpile is going to be running by summer, or stock in C4 is going to go way up (and I'm not talking about the crappy Corvette).

Oh, I added pics of all this crap to the Fury and DIY EFI pages.

Aaron has secured a high nickel late 60s 4-bolt small-block that cleaned nicely at 0.030". The one he picked out before would not, and was sent back to its corner of hell. Did I mention I devoted my entire life to cleaning/sandblasting the rejected block? Before it got scrapped? The mf'ing water jackets were spotless, for crissakes. Hey, not my fault. No, I'm not bitter. Other than that, I am still scheduled to perform "the ultimate race motor" (as Mr. Clements at would always say about a job that I'd be wasting time on by chasing meaningless tenths) valve job on Aaron's E-tecs, which I feel his shortblock will enjoy. Quote Aaron: "This thing is going to be ready for a 175 shot!" (Aaron was upset about the latest NHRA rollbar requirement rule change.) Excellent. Or how about a 200 shot and a high 10 on the scoreboard? Like Troy from Milwaukee always told us: "Put the sssssssssssss on; get paid!" Aaron probably hasn't even factored in the chagrin of his car's regional fans - the fine folks at GLD, Byron, etc, who are already wowed with the car - when it comes back a full second and change meaner! Who wants to go street racing?!

Sally needs a FAST, there I said it. Actually, she needs a Big Stuff 3. Everyone needs a Big Stuff - heck, my dog could use its dual wideband O2s and the ability to control 16 STAGED low impedance injectors! (Donald Fagen Pretzel Logic-style "Owww yeah!") I should just get my dog one, and if she ends up shelving it for now, I'll borrow it until her car is done. Shaun plans on going back to an AOD, and that plus a computer means Sally can just inhale babies instead of having to go through the whole "chewing and swallowing" hassle. We'll see.

Our "1994" party is going to kickass. Stay tuned for that one! The Bulls Starter Jackets, Bajas, and Ace of Base will be flying proudly that evening I can tell you! The hardest part will be getting the smell correct..........


Aaron has a fun new game for everyone to play at the Caprice page!!! I'll put up the carnage pics later; check this folder for damage pics if you're bored (note: there is a miniature folder at the bottom in case you don't feel like downloading 74 terrabyte pics).

Yet another "Scott's car" update: "V6" F-bird page.


(Insert joke about not updating the site, then wry remark to the effect of "deal with it.")

Despite our best efforts, Sally needs a better fuel management plan. Aaron said he could fix the EEC problem in 1/2 hour, and it would cost $1400. Ha ha ha, well, he's right - the AEM EMS would plug right in and start organizing things in Swiss fashion. Shaun thinks something like a F.A.S.T. would be more "rugged" because it's been used by countless folks many times with no problem, but that means jazzing around with the harness. We'll see what Santa brings (probably coal....again). Shaun also bought a house with a 1.75 car garage. That should leave us enough room for a Bridgeport, the Synchrowave, the Snot Rocket, and Scooter Die!. And, maybe my car, scheduled for some serious fabwork. Look for a Shaunthony's website soon, too. Don't worry, it will be every bit as demeaning/sarcastic as this one.....

Despite running hard in it's last outing, Aaron's motor is toast. Check the Caprice page for a fresh update by Aaron - pics of the carnage coming.

Also, Aaron added an update for Scott's car. The car should run hard the next time it's out....if Scott can keep it together! Go to the "V6" F-bird page.

I added a few things to the Fury page, including The Lentech Diaries, in which I whip up a plan to get an AOD under the Fury. I still need to buy a Bridgeport, Ross 8.8:1 pistons, roller cam/lifters/pushrods/AREngineering timing cover, an AEM EMS, injectors/fuel line, and other miscellaneousness. Then my car will be theory. But, I did add some sneaky spy photos to the Fury page. There will be an announcement soon.


If "not updating this site" was a business, I would be CEO and President.

Luckily for Shaun, I was finally able to downsize, crop, make thumbnails, and upload the original 90 skibillion pixel, 4 terrabyte pics he sent of his car. Thanks to D, Sally's shiney self is available for your viewing pleasure in her current state. Yeah, there are circular links on the with it until I/we have time to sort everything out. Sally page.

Aaron bailed the Caprice out of paint jail and campaigned it a bit at his company picnic before yanking the motor for freshening. Remember gang, when talking about your car in the office, NEVER say how fast it is in the quarter, or what it traps; only report 0-60 times. Sure, your soul might be compromised, but at least the Car-and-Driver-reading management boners will be able to gauge the scariness of your car. Pics of the motor, along with a detailed account of a rad Shaunthony's valve job should show up fairly shortly.

Shaun, Pratt, and I went to Byron a few weeks ago. Sally made it out, made a pass (line lock, anyone?), and almost burned down on the way home. Luckily for me, I made Shaun install the fuel rail the night before (so I wouldn't catch hell if it F'd up), which came loose and sent gas everywhere. Then the fuel rail O-ring of #1's injector tore. We Macgyver'd it back together with the bottom O-ring installed in the fuel rail position and a piece of BOV hose in the manifold bung. It worked great! Special thanks to Mike for having the tools we needed, and hanging out on the side of the road in the middle of nowhere. Drinking Mickeys and working on the passenger side of Sally's motor is now against the law.

I'm back from CA.....and the Fury's progress is slowly building steam again. It's more R&D mode than "make/buy stuff" mode, but there are/may be some cool innovations on the way, including (but not limited to): Chrysler B/RB 5.0 hydraulic roller lifter adapters, Chrysler B/RB AOD hell I should just buy a Mustang. Stay tuned for some pretty wild pics / documentaries, though.

It's time for the Synchrowave!! Shaun's Johnny pro Miller TIG is Johnny rad! So far, 2 pop cans and a couple of Razor (those waste-of-356-mini-scooters you always see little twerps on) platforms have been welded together, along with some parts for a machine at (our work).

That's all for now....look for some 11s out of the Caprice before winter, some wheels-up Sally launches, and a scary Fury next summer....


Wow, no updates for 2 months....I am a delinquent, for sure. Some extremely cool things have happened.

I have a "job" and will be relocating to Hanford, CA for the time being. If I told you what I was going to be doing, I'd have to kill you. But.........let's just say it involves hemispherical head conversions for SBCs, SBFs, etc, with ports designed by the guy who CNC's John Force's heads out of billets. Even cooler than that is I'll be helping with some stuff that, well, it's scientific, but if you watch X-men and know what Adamantium, it's kind of like that.

The Caprice is getting painted. Still. Aaron bought all the hot rod parts necessary for a motor freshening / build by Bud at Edgewater, and he's even going to re-install A.C. as the dictator of cabin climate control! Czars Zack Morris and Mr. Belding are upset that they weren't considered for the position, but Aaron figured they'd get over it.

The EEC in Sally isn't exactly responding as it should to tune changes, so nobody (not even other fellow rocket scientists) can figure it out. Specifically, the injector pulsewidth locks at a particular value and will not increase despite increasing MAF values. Maybe real dyno time will change this.....or at least having a guy at the helm who practically invented this software. It's sitting - but it's fast! Plus, I won the coveted "Boob of the month" award when I installed Sally's valve cover gasket incorrectly and caused Shaun to poo his pants during a run in which he thought the motor had exploded. I have a feeling I won't be able to live that one down.

My grandparents, who always pull me aside and whisper "It's okay to let go of a dream" when I start talking about my car, have once again ridiculed me for owning a car that doesn't run. Well, I will tell you why it doesn't run. This time, it was just because Shaun and I were busy fabricating a quadruple turbo kit around a motor I didn't even have in the car, that's all! But, owning a perfectly running tan colored grocery getter with tan leather interior and a landau top is a "dream" I may never realize, they're right. View the Fury page for details.

Oh, and I'm typing my first article: "Why Heavy Cars Are Better II," or "Build it like a Pontiac II," or "To Jim Hand: Thanks For the Torque, PMD!" It's actually going to tie a lot of hilarious stuff together in a cool way, or a lot of cool stuff together in a hilarious way......regardless, I'm eating pizza. Delays are: still working on a real-world-cost-batman-estimate-comparo between a couple of hypothetical motors, but let's just say a small geared, small cammed, small converter'd mid-11 second 4200lb car has never been easier to build. It's the article Mopar people don't want you to read!


Sally is running well - maybe a little too well. On it's maiden voyage with the 72s, resistor pack, new Pro-M Univer and tune, Sally was running stock smooth. No bucking, sputtering, hanging idle. WOT mashes blast lots of soot, but that's all tuning. I heard the sound of a pin hitting the floor.....

Everyone at is excited about Hot Rod's new Pump Gas drags. The blurb about it a month or two ago was short, but it really looks like the field has exploded. The cars in this month's issue were the rejects(!). Based on the invitation of a couple guys (and by the speed of the legal rejects), this is going to be a fast field! Hopefully, and with any luck, more people will start building for the war on the streets as a result of all this. "But, building a car like that requires cubic dollars." Go buy a shifter cart then, and while everybody is actively not caring about your $5000 9-second ride, head out to Wal-Mart and buy that kickass home entertainment center you've been eyeing.


Bio Page finally updated. Go to it!


The Caprice is getting painted.

Scott might have some money for new injectors and a new tune for summer...we hope.

Sally runs again, thanks to the super trick looking (and working) Shaunthony's resistor box. Some fine tuning with the Tweecer will be necessary (as well as a tank of fresh gas), but it ran enough for us to fiddle with timing, fuel pressure, and allow everything to heat cycle. The 72# Siemens and Univer MAF meter definately look trick though, and it sure is good to again hear the Incon muffler bearings whistling down after shutting the car off!

Some very cool fuel and exhaust system pieces were fabbed over spring break for the Fury; unfortunately only a few spy photos were smuggled out before security caught spy photographers and administered Pirate punches. Also, the 440 has been bored, honed, and painted (turns out the #7 bore was NOT cracked - score!). Custom Diamond pistons are on their way, and from there it's time for decking, balancing, and tossing things back together. A Megasquirt is also on its, what to do about timing? Current options are an MSD pro-billet, or dropping the "locked" Ford dizzy in and running a start-retard for easier starting. Or, run a crank trigger and the Megasquirt's EDIS module (I have 2 Ford coil packs), but I'm not real enthused about a trigger. We will see....


Pat Daly's Nova FINALLY added to the All-Stars page. Oh yeah.

Shaun gives a detailed update on the current state of his car, and also gives a quick math lesson on the side. Go to the Sally Smile page.

Watch for more cars to be added to the All-Stars page, as well as a couple of articles by yours truly.


Enjoy the No Excuse page make-over - it took me a little bit, but it's cleaner and more efficient. Scott's car will be added to the mix, and I added more to Baima's page. A bio page update is coming as well. Also enjoy the addition to the "misc" page - it was all Shaun's idea!

Shaun's fuel system install is almost done. We're looking for OEM 5.0 injector harness connectors to make the resistor pack harness. This way, it can be removed later without destroying the harness. Are we smart or what?

Aaron's new plan is to do a quickie teardown of his motor before tooling season starts again. Plans call for re-hone, re-ring, bearings, new valvesprings and a valvejob. We've got our work cutout for us.

Shaun gave me his old Walbro GSS392 255LPH pump for my birthday - thanks budday! One less thing I've got to buy. Also, the 440 is at Mr. Clements' shop. It has a crack in one of the bores (grr), so it has to be sleeved. All that's left is Edelbrock cleanup/valvejob, wait for parts, and assembly. Oh, and of course, the Super Custom Secret Shaunthony's induction setup...more when that happens.


Yeah, fuckers! EFI for the Fury is 90% complete. It's all finishing work from here. That, and coming up with the cash for a stand alone fuel management system. I think it will be $10,000 well spent. I also scored a killer deal on a set of throttle bodies on eBay. Check out Pony Brains on a Wedge for more info.

Aaron is having the Caprice painted over the winter, and took the time to write out how he went from 12.70s @ 105 to 12.05 @ 111. Check the Caprice page for the update.

Shaun bought/half installed a new fuel system for Sally - can you say Cartech Renegade Stage 3 Fuel System (Cartech 5/8" fuel rails with two 255 LPH @ 90psi Pierberg pumps) and 72# injectors? Sure you can! More pics of those goodies as they develop.


An excellent Harold Milner article (the first of a few installments to come) added: "Using all of your speedometer?"


Scooter Die! is finished, suckers! It's real fast. It's also real dangerous. We'll have pics and a full report later. Where is Eric Spurgeon???

The Caprice goes 12.05 @ 111 after more tuning and removal of the front swaybar. This is through the exhaust, on slicks. 12.50s in full street trim on BFG D/Rs, folks. Aaron removed his exhaust to get an 11 second timeslip (the weight savings of the exhaust alone would have put him into the 11s), and then it started raining while he was in line. We could say it's an 11 second car, but what's the name of this site? No Excuse! It's still a 12 second car. Next season though, buddy. Next season.


"Why Heavy Cars Are Better" article submitted by Aaron. A must read for heavy car enthusiasts and light car pussies alike.


Scooter Die! is nearing completion!
Scooter Die! is an 8 foot long scooter made of schedule 40 steel pipe and is powered by a jockey shifted 125cc dirt bike motor. We're experiencing some drive-compatibility issues, but don't worry. Shaun and I will be dead shortly.

Stay tuned for pics!


The Caprice goes 12.35 @ 109!
The Fury breaks into the 14s with a 14.95 @ 92.8!
Sally runs a 15.5, then a 13, and Baima was too gay to run.


Extra Sally updates, including accounts of Sally at the track.

Scott Dickinson's bad '73 Chally added to the All Stars page.


Chris's destructo-mobile has been added to the All Stars page - You'll love the $300, 2 day installation of an M90 blower! I did not name the picture with the hood down "cocksuckers.jpg!"

Shaun and I went to the track and punched some people, see E.T.s and MPH's at the Sally Smile page.

Aaron is back from Florida and inbetween work and school, is out autographing the pavement with a big pair of BFGs. Shaun and I have also prevented him from wasting money on needless hardware that he won't use in the future, much less dip him into the 11s. Instead, he will be saving for a large and in-charge upgrade that will be about $10,000.

The Fury has a brand newly powdercoated set of Cop Rims in its trunk (courtesy of Mixon/Bubba racing) and are awaiting mounting/balancing. Hopefully the old "H" steelies on the Fury will bring some coinage on ePay. The 3.23 suregrip has yet to be put to the torque wrench, but if it passes, it should wind up out back before the season is over.

Get this! There is a sales event in Chicagoland (by Mitsubishi) entitled "No Excuses." Okay, so big deal you say, it's a common phrase. Well, yeah, you're right, but THEY PIRATED THE EXACT SAME FONT AS OUR LOGO PAGE!! ARRRRRRRRRR! It is actually really funny, and we should have some pics of the some of the billboards up soon. (And for the record, we would have a really hard time suing them.....yes, I already thought about it.)


At long last - an update! Let's see, all No Excuse mobiles are exploding (in a good way) more than the explosion factory down town. (In fairness to the Chicago Explosion Factory, they've been battling serious insurance issues, so explosion production has been cut back considerably.)

Aaron's car responded well to the new intake. 12.50s @ 107, along with BSFC calculations told us his attack-mode smallblock is putting out about 500 crank ponies (400 RWHP). See the Caprice page for the gory details.

Shaun and I walked away from a Viper GTS! Check the Sally page for the story....

The Fury got a couple new toys, one of which being a Sure-grip 3.23 to replace the peg-leg. (Say, that reminds me: You know why the new pirate movie, "Pirates of the Carribean," wasn't rated for a while? It's because they were trying to decide if it should be rated PG-13 or ARRRRRRRRRRR!) The other toys cannot be disclosed at the moment (as a suprise for some people who are convinced my car sucks, hee hee!), but all will be revealed in the coming month.

Holy Crap! we finished Baima's car. 2 days + $200 = M90 blown, drawn-thru carb'd 289. This car has more cut corners than a paper snowflake, but what do you expect when the owner doesn't give a shit about QC, and the labor is free? Talk about a breadboard - we don't have to buy the parts or drive the car!!


In what may be one of the last updates for a while, the Fury page has been re-written, an update from Aaron on his car has been added to his section, and some 'best-of' quotes have been added to the "Saints" page.


Craaaaaaaaaaaap - Big Anthony Mixon's black car is smashed in the front. It's fixable, but he's got a notion to "do things right," which means paint. That's too bad, because I think the hints of rust on the car really made it 46% scarier. Of course, BA always manages to find the perfect angles of the car in photos, so all you viewers in double-click land don't know what I'm talking about. But, when a door shuts, a window opens, right? He called me and asked me if I approved of putting the 71's 500+ HP bullet, trans, and exhaust into his '68 VIP. Like I'm going to say no to that! Also, why did he need my approval?

Aaron receives the 'Ninny of the year' award, just barely edging out Fran Drescher. Whoops, that's nanny, not ninny. Anyway, Aaron thinks his car will rust more if he drives it around in the rain. He also complains about how much it costs to drive, how much it eats Amsoil, how fast it is, etc. Then he starts yelling because his car has "rust on every body panel." Join the club, bucko! It's your daily driver now!!

9:1 440? 10:1 440? Man, I don't even know. If Shaun can get me garage time in the 'Garage Mahal' this summer, it's 9:1. Funny, because Sally is always in there.....but this summer, she'll be totally tuned and eating Vipers, Ferraris, Corvettes, or anything driven by 60 year old men with expensive leather baseball jackets and sunglasses pulling out of Woodfield. Back to my original story - the 440 will almost certainly be fuel injected before the end of the summer. Mr. Magarian currently employs "the best TIG welder in the world!" and thinks he can set me up on the injector bung / manifold deal. YES!

Professor Robertson let Shaun keep the Bosch wideband O2 sensor for the summer, and you know what that means!! We can monitor air/smell ratio of Grille-Zilla when cooking Polishes this summer! Just kidding - expect all 3 No Excuse mobiles to have Johnny Razor Sharp tunes. Oh, and the DIY-WBO2 worked like a charm in the lab. Time to build mine!

That's all for now, folks. I have to go bomb some more finals.


So, we all have running cars now.

- Aaron's car has made a new best of 370 RWHP and over 400 lb-ft at the rear wheels. Actaully, that's lower than it should be, but he was really glad to see the power back.

- Shaun's car can move up and down the driveway and idle! Just kidding, he's waiting for the motor to break in and for his melted Pro-M meter to come back.

- And, I, the jobless wonder, have found a $10/hour job this summer. What will 10 an hour buy me? Hopefully a one way ticket to the 12s! (On motor!) Which implies that I'll use some power adder......if you're smart, you can figure it out. Hint: my car may have enough of it to bwow itsewf up (think Ja Rule).

More updates coming soon!!!